DTPA

The DTPA (Death to Pants Association) is a Military Organization/Political Party dedicated to their doctrine against pants. They are known for their preferred method of removing pants, burning. They have been criticized for their unorthodox methods and have met considerable disapproval from pant lovers everywhere. They have since grown to be a worldwide organization recognized for their gusto and dedication to their manifesto.

Overview

In July 2003, Supreme Pantless Commander Allos began his fight against pants. Initial reception was mixed but soon a number of recruits signed up for their cause. An early assassination attempt by the 'demi-god' Ness made everyone believe that the DTPA was no more. Allos released an official statement that confirmed the defeat. But behind the smoke screen, the DTPAs numbers were growing.

The DTPA scored a surprise victory against France by overtaking them within hours and burning the pants away. Holland and Germany quickly became DTPA commonwealth. The overtake came to a halt in the United States when the higher ups could not decide if miniskirts were considered "pants". The raid continued when the message 'Attack New York' was posted in a cryptic message by Allos. During the raid in October 2003, the member Ketchup345 was fired from the group and the DTPA denounced all knowledge of his actions.

In November 2003, Ketchup returned with the A-DTPA, an organization that had the opposite goal of the DTPA. They wanted to save pants and celebrate them. Uncle_Bob, a member of the DTPA, founded the A-A-DTPA (Anti-Anti-Death To Pants Association) and later the NAA-DTPA (Negative Anti Anti-Death To Pants Association Squared) Neither of these would stick.

The Trials

There were several trials that took place after the DTPA and A-DTPA began their rivalry. On November 22nd, 2003, the Allos Trial began. The charges were "…over the years, raped FK no0bs feet, and stolen various undergarments from other DTPA member's living quarters." The trial got off to a rocky start, and eventually the lawyers would all become uninvolved and the entire jury was made up of DTPA members. Despite these setbacks, Ketchup attempted to make the case against Allos using only circumstantial evidence, but the trial came to an abrupt end when Allos was shot in the courtroom. Due to Bradicus' powers he was able to revive Allos. The case was eventually thrown out, with no jury decision due to the use of a Hydrogen Bomb in the building.

Later, however, the following news piece was released:

Thursday, December 4th. Riots have broken out near the ADTPA headquarters earlier today, where various pants of all shapes and sizes have come together to protest. "I can't believe this!" one pair of trousers exclaimed. "I trusted them for so long, and then they do something like this!" The ADTPA, the Anti Death To Pants Association, is a coalition formed to combat the DTPA, Death To Pants Association. The DTPA has been notorious as of late, mainly for the advocation and pre-emptive action of the ritual burning of pants. The ADTPA was formed as a tactical response of outrage towards the DTPA's actions and beliefs, and stands to protect the rights of pants everywhere. Wednesday night, December 3rd, at a fancy restaurant downtown, a paying costumer was dining happily, when a glob of ketchup dripped off of his hamburger and onto the leg of his pants. "The stain just won't come out!" said the customer when asked to speak with us. "The ketchup ruined my pants forever! I had to throw them away!" The outrage quickly spread throughout the world of pants, and various protest groups had been formed out of the ensuing chaos. The leader of the riots could not be reached for comment, but various members of the protests claim they will do whatever it takes to make sure the ADTPA leader, known by many only as "Ketchup", is exiled from the country. When reached for comment, DTPA leader Allos proclaimed that "they had this coming for quite a while, now. I'm surprised it didn't happen earlier than it did. I see this as a step forward for the prosperity of the DTPA as a whole." The ADTPA refused to comment. As always, we will keep you updated on the situation as new information becomes available.

Ketchup denied the stains.

On December 7th, 2003, the DTPA vs FKLs trial would begin.

The charges brought against the DTPA would include: "Terrorism, burning/killing pants, risk of injury to pants, putting thousands of little Chinese children out of a job and indecent exposure". Allos was quick to deny the charges, and instead pointed out that the A-DTPA should be the ones on trial for disturbing the FKL peace. Minor charges were also brought against Uncle_Bob for not getting the proper permits for building/growing his new house. Ketchup was late to the case, which helped lead to a large amount of Chaos. Uncle reached his breaking point, quickly attacking bailiff SpikeOtacon and Judge Spartan117, unleashed Micheal Jackson into the building and called upon his escape vehicle "The Shroom Mobile" to assist his and Allos' escape. When the doors were locked to prevent their escape, Uncle released Ringo Starr. Before they could escape, Ketchup arrived. Ketchup would mention he was also suggested that the DTPA had Nuclear Warheads

Bradicus tried to explain that the "Nuclear Weapons" were actually carnival rides for children, and that the Chinese Pants factories being shut down was good because it stopped child labor. Ketchup retaliated, stating that Chinese kids needed to work, and that carnival rides don't use nuclear warheads. But Bradicus made a point when he stated that there were no good carnival rides that didn't use nuclear warheads. After some back and forth arguing, the DTPA dropped their biggest piece of news yet: They had a spy in the A-DTPA. The spy, SpikeOtacon, revealed that the A-DTPA had used illegal bribes to recruit him, among other shady tactics. The A-DTPA dropped the charges.

The "Abdurs Lawl" Era

The Fresh Kills Landfill suffered a mighty setback as a result of Abdur's Law, and the DTPA was not excluded from the downfall. Not only were some long-time members given warnings but the DTPA's secret headquarters were exposed by a sour operative. But the worst was yet to come, as a new Political party arose. The Duck Party started their tirade but their efforts were cut down by the DTPA funding and distributing an "Anti-Duck Party Kit" that consisted of an NES, a Light Zapper and a copy of the game Duck Hunt. Free Training was also available. The kit was a success, and the Duck Party was eradicated.

Upon the mission being declared a success, Allos suggested that the FKL Congress create a FKL Defense Force, which would have members of both DTPA and the A-DTPA, with separate dress codes. The idea was put into action.

The N-DPTA

August 6, 2006 when a revival campaign was led by Allos, SpikeOtacon, and Akdov to bring FKL back to its former glory. The new DTPA was to be named "Neo-DTPA", to signal the new era and give respect to the DTPA of old. An advertising campaign with the 300 Spartans was launched, it was considered a mild success. Some time after the campaign, Allos returned to FKL to announce his resignation as Supreme Pantless Commander, and gave his title to SpikeOtacon. The N-DTPA is currently running smaller operations with a smaller, more highly trained staff.

Final Member List

Allos
Guntz348
Bradicus (RIP)
Uncle_Bob (Honorary)
Dime (revoked shortly afterwards)
Kizaragu
Jaks
SpikeOtacon
Sord (went neutral)
PhotonDrop
Trickstr
Ketchup345 (via forged signature)
polishedweasel
Outrider
NeoPaladin
Spartan117
Zaneatron
JTeebo
monkeyfist
Mechgun_Mike (later Kadavreski)
Scrub (resigned)
space_butler
Shattered_weasel
Robo47
ABDUR101 (Sympathized with the cause)
darkgunner (later EphekZ)
Khabarakh
Noobliterator
Akdov
BlueDagger
Sayara
Tessu

External Links

DTPA History

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